Ethan is just a month shy of turning 1 year old, and my body is still recovering. I am trying desperately to lose my "baby" weight, which c'mon, we all have to admit is not baby weight a year later. It's fat, plain and simple. I weighed 200 pounds when I came home from the hospital after having Ethan; when I started the South Beach Diet the third week in November, I weighed 181. The day before Christmas, I was down to 172 and I was so proud that my efforts were paying off. After pigging out and totally losing my focus over the holidays, I am now at 175.5, and the scale doesn't seem to be moving. I don't even want to know what all this yo-yo'ing has done to my metabolism, which already seemed to be sluggish because of me having Gestational Diabetes. I am trying to restore my energy and enthusiasm for making the right food choices. I still have my goal of losing 25 pounds by May so that I will look fantastic for the two weddings I am attending. I am thinking about finding a gorgeous dress on the Internet and printing out the picture to post on my refrigerator; it will remind me of my goal and how great I will look if I resist temptation.
This past Saturday night, we went to my parent's house to watch the Patriots' first playoff game (GO PATS!). My Mom made garlic shrimp, rice, and a salad, plus German chocolate pie for dessert. At halftime, out came the chips and salsa. When I got home and into bed, I had a gallbladder attack. It was so painful that I couldn't find a comfortable position in bed. By morning, it had gone away and I ate very carefully all day. I am hoping I don't have another attack and need surgery to remove my gallbladder.
I am sick again, this time with a cough and laryngitis. Ethan is sick again too. Having a child in daycare means being sick ALL the time.
My face is extremely broken out, and I'm expecting AF tomorrow. My body feels so foreign to me. I am envious of those people who have a baby and can fit into their pre-pregnancy jeans in a matter of weeks. I am jealous of those people who have time to exercise. I am definitely jealous of people with flawless skin and fashionable clothes. I am always so pressed for time that I barely look put together.
If anyone has seen my healthy, thinner body, please let it know that it's okay to come home!!!
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3 comments:
Big Hugs Laura. It's hard especially when that 1 yr mark comes up.
I too am sending you hugs! You just sound so frustrated so I wanted you to know I was thinking about you!
Hi Laura,
I've been wondering where you went. I'm glad to see a new post from you, even though you are still having a rough time. I know it doesn't help, but at least you did not gain back ALL the weight over the holidays. I think that was pretty impressive in and of itself. Did you ever get your thyroid checked?
Sorry to hear that Ethan's been sick again. UUGH.
Well, I just wanted to let you know I've been thinking of you. And remember, before the holidays, you'd slowly watched the weight come off, so it is doable, and you can get back on track.
Love,
Sara
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